Have you ever wondered what sets the top 10% of women apart from the rest? Surprisingly, research and observations suggest that 90% of women fall into certain habits, mindsets, or behaviors that hold them back from reaching their full potential.
If you’re not doing these things, congratulationsyou’re already ahead of the majority. But if you recognize yourself in any of these patterns, don’t worry, awareness is the first step toward change.
In this article, we’ll explore:
- The common habits that 90% of women have
- Why these behaviors keep them from success
- How the top 10% think and act differently
- Actionable steps to break free from limiting patterns
Let’s dive in.
1. They Seek External Validation
What 90% of Women Do:
They constantly look for approval from partners, friends, social media, or society. They fear judgment, so they:
- Avoid taking risks
- Change their opinions to fit in
- Overthink their appearance or decisions
Why It Holds Them Back:
Seeking validation means your self-worth depends on others. This leads to:
- Lack of confidence
- Missed opportunities
- Living someone else’s life instead of your own
What the Top 10% Do Instead:
- They validate themselves first
- They don’t fear rejection because they trust their own judgment
- They take risks without needing everyone’s approval
How to Fix It:
- Practice self-affirmation (write down your strengths daily)
- Ask yourself: “Would I do this if no one was watching?”
- Gradually expose yourself to discomfort (speak up, set boundaries)
2. They Stay in Comfort Zones
What 90% of Women Do:
They stick to what’s familiar; jobs they don’t love, relationships that don’t serve them, or routines that don’t challenge them.
Why It Holds Them Back:
Growth happens outside comfort zones. Staying safe leads to:
- Regret (“What if I had tried?”)
- Stagnation (no progress in career, health, or relationships)
What the Top 10% Do Instead:
- They embrace discomfort (new skills, difficult conversations)
- They see failure as feedback, not a dead-end
- They prioritize growth over comfort
How to Fix It:
- Do one uncomfortable thing daily (e.g., networking, negotiating salary)
- Set a “fear list” (things you avoid—and do them anyway)
- Surround yourself with people who push you
3. They Neglect Self-Investment
What 90% of Women Do:
They put everyone else first—kids, partner, work—and neglect their own growth. They:
- Don’t read or learn new skills
- Skip workouts because they’re “too busy”
- Never invest in coaching or self-improvement
Why It Holds Them Back:
You can’t pour from an empty cup. Neglecting yourself leads to:
- Burnout
- Lack of confidence
- Feeling stuck in life
What the Top 10% Do Instead:
- They prioritize self-care (mental, physical, financial health)
- They invest in courses, books, and mentors
- They know that bettering themselves benefits everyone around them
How to Fix It:
- Dedicate 30 minutes daily to learning (podcasts, books)
- Schedule workouts like important meetings
- Allocate a budget for self-improvement (even if small)
4. They Fear Setting Boundaries
What 90% of Women Do:
They say “yes” when they mean “no” because they fear:
- Being seen as rude
- Disappointing others
- Conflict
Why It Holds Them Back:
Without boundaries, you:
- Get taken advantage of
- Feel drained and resentful
- Lose respect (from yourself and others)
What the Top 10% Do Instead:
- They communicate boundaries clearly and confidently
- They know saying “no” to others means saying “yes” to themselves
- They attract people who respect their limits
How to Fix It:
- Start small (“I can’t help with that this time”)
- Use the “Not Sorry” method (stop over-apologizing)
- Remind yourself: Boundaries = Self-Respect
5. They Compare Themselves to Others
What 90% of Women Do:
They scroll social media and feel inadequate because:
- Someone else is “more successful”
- Their body doesn’t look a certain way
- They’re not as far along as peers
Why It Holds Them Back:
Comparison kills:
- Motivation
- Self-esteem
- Joy in your own journey
What the Top 10% Do Instead:
- They focus on their own progress
- They celebrate others without feeling threatened
- They limit social media consumption
How to Fix It:
- Do a social media detox (unfollow accounts that trigger you)
- Keep a “win journal” (track your small victories)
- Remind yourself: “Someone else’s success doesn’t diminish mine.”
Final Thoughts: Are You in the Top 10%?
If you don’t do these five things, you’re already ahead of 90% of women. If you do, now you know how to change.
The key difference? The top 10% take intentional action. They:
- Trust themselves over outside opinions
- Seek growth over comfort
- Invest in themselves unapologetically
- Set boundaries without guilt
- Focus on their own race, not others’
Which one will you work on first?
Read also: 12 Dangerous Traits of Mummy’s Boys
